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By Larry Canning on 11/06/2012 10:38 AM
My last blog was chapter 5 of my quest for my first Senior Golf Tournament title which turned out to be a sharp reminder why I retired from the tour all those years ago. And yes that's right… This instalment would be….Chapter 6!

After my narrow escape from the women’s locker room at Concord Golf Club, I hurried to the first tee for my first competitive round since golf ball manufacturers replaced balata with uro-plasma-spins-but-goes-miles-thane . Arthur Bosch or “Boschy” as he is known, (Which rates about a 2 on the scale of creative nicknames) and David Armstrong or “Army” (That's about a 3) are my playing partners for the first two rounds. The wind is blowing hard from the left on this tight par 4 first hole and my caddy hands me a a rescue club. After I explain that the people on the neighbouring practice fairway could need rescuing if I hit that, he gives me something with far less loft and I proceed to rip a low fading Driver down the left side of the fairway and the gallery (my wife Sandra and her...
By Larry Canning on 4/04/2012 11:25 AM

In chapter 4 I left you with an image of me on the eve of my Senior Professional Golf Career…stuck in the women's toilet at Concord Golf Club. Sorry if you were about to sit down for a nice family dinner….. the saga continues-

I quickly duck my head down, pick up my trousers and try to hide my size 13 Niblicks. Another peek over the door tells me Sandra and I aren't the only ones in the toilet. The cubicle two down is also engaged. Timing is now critical and when I hear a flush, I wait for our guest to leave. Another flush tells me she is having a problem so I take a punt, tip toe out of there and discretely make my way straight to the room  which has a silhouette of a man wearing a top hat on the door. Safe and sound I almost feel relaxed until I hear a male voice saying “Is Larry Canning in hear… he’s on the bloody tee!”… chapter 6 coming soon.

By Larry Canning on 15/03/2012 9:18 PM
DAY 1 dawns and if I was a tad nervy during practice than I’m now doing an impersonation of OJ Simpson at a family reunion.

My long standing wife who has been there with me through thin and even thinner is at my side assuring me that I still have on of the best swings in Willow Vale. As soon as we arrive at the course I head straight to the locker room, making sure not to let one rip without the aid if the porcelain safety net. I find a cubicle as far away from everywhere as possible and drop the old duds. Now being 6 feet 4 has it’s advantages and probably none more so than the ability to see over toilet cubicle doors. Just as I’m about to take up the usual posture someone else walks into the toilet opposite me… It’s my wife!

Instincts are a funny thing and when I saw the back of Sandra’s head going into the cubicle opposite, for a split second I didn’t think much of it. I see the back of her head going in and out of doorways every day and yes, usually right after I drop my duds. After my head...
By Larry Canning on 10/03/2012 10:10 AM
I have arranged my practice round with my best mate and former roomy, Chris Hearn and he is waiting for me on the first tee. Whilst Hearny is one of the most underrated strikers of the ball in the country, we have been mates for nearly 35 years, even slept together in a waterbed out in the sticks once. Aah yes, I can remember it clearly….it was a moonlight night in Narabri….Chris in those pale blue shorty pyjamas…me still wearing my footjoy golf shoes because my feet were that bloody cold. Actually Hearny was a chronic sleep walker and he scared the living daylights out of me when I woke up to see him standing on the edge of the waterbed yelling “Women and children first”.

I know Chris is not going to add to my list of intimidators although when he hands his driver to his 11-year-old son Jackson, for a hit on the second tee, I get a tad toey. I have just pumped one out there 200 metres, and if Jackson slips it past me I’ll have to put a hit out on him and his dad and they such nice blokes. Luckily he gets...
By Larry Canning on 7/03/2012 10:01 AM
In my last Blog, I referred the fragility of a 50 Year Old's nerves when attempting to play golf for large sums of money. I started to recall my first experience on the Legends Tour after having not played the Circuit for about 200 years and how I tried to deal with my impending incontinence. Here is part 2….

As I drive into the car park at Concord I recall the advice I received from “Golf Mind Coach” and fellow “Inside Golf” scribe, Matt Howe the day before. “All the great players you’ll come across this week, walk, talk and smell the same as you Larry….they are all just normal people”. With this in mind I walk straight into the pro-shop to buy my yardage book. Who do you reckon is the first bloke I run into? Former Australian Open champion, Rodger Davis. “Larry, how are going…good to see you”. Now if that voice sounds like me…John Laws sounds like Neville Wran. Rodger explains how to get to the registration office and I head there clearing my throat and whispering “Valvoline” over and over to myself.

By Larry Canning on 18/02/2012 4:44 PM
When I was watching Peter Senior lose yet another play-off on the US Champions Tour, I was reminded how tough the whole gig can be  can be on 50 year old nerves. I remember my first Seniors Event like it was yesterday. That's because at my age, I cant remember what the hell I did yesterday.

Here' is my account of that week… well the first instalment anyway….

It feels like years ago when I was explaining how I was soon reaching that milestone for a golf professional, “50” and now suddenly I’m 20 minutes away from my first event. “The Handa Senior Australian Open”. Despite the fact that it’s only a practise round, I’m as apprehensive as Fred Nile at the opening of Break Back Mountain II and Shane Warne at a friends kids christening. Since I last played for this kind of money, I have whacked on some kilo’s, lost some more of my fringe and developed a limp I haven’t had an ounce of preparation and I’m about to put my fragile golf game on public display in the biggest senior golf tournament in the country....
By Larry Canning on 4/02/2012 12:35 PM

Its not often I’m part of golfing history.. well if you don’t count being the tallest male golf pro in the world to be out driven by a 14 year old girl anyway. As part of my, writing and talking about golf job, I chose to caddy for Australian ALPG Tour Player Lyndsey Wright in the Women's NSW Open last week at Oatlands in Sydney and I must say it was a brilliant experience. Not only did my charge come within a sniff of winning but we had the opportunity to play in the final group with the worlds next golfing superstar in Lydia Ko. This 14 year-old Kiwi is something to behold with her laser like long game, deft touch and fearless putting stroke, but the feature that struck me the most was Lydia herself. She is easily the sweetest kid on Planet Earth who not only respects everyone around her but the game of golf and all it stands for.

I cant imagine any other kid I would rather intrust our game with for the next generation…..  

By Larry Canning on 9/01/2012 7:47 PM

My second 2011 highlight was watching a 21 year old kid more gifted than Justin Bieber and Captain America rolled into one, suffering the worst Masters meltdowns since 1996, then coming back a couple of months later and massacring an even better field at The US Open. Rory McIlroy is an absolute revelation and arrived as a major champion at precisely the time when golf needed a new hero. What's even more impressive about this kid is that he is a good bloke who actually connects to us, the fans. Its stating the bloody obvious but Rory McIlroy is our next superstar….

By Larry Canning on 21/12/2011 7:14 AM

He drinks too much Guinness, he’s a overweight and the nearest he gets to a gym is when he catches up with his mate Jim at the pub. He is also the British Open Champ and my first Highlight choice for 2011. Ohh by the way his name is Darren Clarke….. Never before, have I connected so strongly with a Major Champion. Darren epitomizes the old fashioned Aussie attitude of despite great riches and fame never taking yourself too seriously. Too cap it all off he is Irish and I’m from Irish ancestry….. The only thing I don’t have in common with Darren is my inability to control bodily functions when playing golf for any type of serious cash…. And a certain amount of golfing talent…

By Larry Canning on 18/12/2011 7:59 AM

Yesterday I watched Geoff Ogilvy smooth his way around Victoria Golf Course in a mere 63 hits. He eagled the first, birdied the second and then went on the most serene run of birdies I have ever seen. This guy is cooler than Fred Couples, Phil Mickelson and Samuel L Jackson all rolled into one. Geoff is my new “Cool Hero”. I’m not letting him out of my sight today for the final round… Thats if he doesn’t take out an AVO on me  

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